Tips to Overcome Toddler Bath Time Fears
Takeaway: If your toddler is suddenly afraid of taking a bath, you might be wondering how you can support your toddler and make bath time fun again. In this post, Dr. Julie shares her top tips for supporting your toddler with his or her bath time anxiety using simple, play-based and emotional regulation strategies that honor your toddler’s feelings and help your child feel safe and supported.
Many children go through the “I don’t want to take a bath” phase, and it often comes out of nowhere. One day your child loves splashing in the tub and the next they’re not willing to get into the bath under any circumstances. Here are some tips if you have a toddler who is refusing to take a bath.
Start with Connection to Aid Problem-Solving
It might seem counterintuitive, but the first step is to connect with your toddler’s emotions about bath time. Start by validating your toddler’s worries about the bath, no matter how silly they seem. Here are some statements you can use:
I understand that you don’t want to take a bath. I hear you.
I’m listening and I understand that you don’t want to take a bath right now.
I hear you saying that you don’t want a bath.
One you’ve validated your toddler’s fears, ask questions about your toddler’s perspective and try to understand the reason he or she no longer finds bath time fun. Instead of a simple “why,” get specific so your toddler has a better chance of sharing the information you’re looking for. The key here is to understand your toddler’s emotions and concerns so you can problem-solve and address them with one of the bath time refusal solutions in the next section of this post.
Do you feel scared? Worried? Sad? Help me understand why.
Is there something you don’t like about the bath?
Is there a part of taking bath you like the best?
What's the worst part of taking a bath?
If your toddler is able to answer your questions, you’ll better understand his or hear fears and anxieties about bath time. You may learn that your toddler is experiencing sensory aversions to the bath like water that is too cold or too hot, that a favorite bath toy has been lost, that your toddler wants a different parent to be present at bath time, or that fears about washing your toddler’s hair (and water getting in his or her eyes) is the problem. Once you know, you can try one of the remedies below.
Things You Can Do to Make Bath Time Fun Again
Try a “No Hair Washing Bath”
My toddler’s bath time refusal was because of the fear of getting water on his face or eyes. Once he told us that this was the part of the bath he didn’t like, we started offering him “no hair washing baths” that were focused on play, splashing, and having fun. After two “no hair washing baths” that he loved, we slowly reintroduced hair washing. The first time we washed his hair, we only washed the back of his hair. Then we let him take a few more “no hair washing baths” before washing all of his hair while using a crown hair visor to keep the drips off of his face. It worked!
Change the Color of the Bath Water
Try to create excitement for the bath with special colored water. Changing the bath water’s color can be done with a couple of different products, and our family has had good luck with the Crayon Bath Products, but many other brands are available. We’ve used Crayola bath bombs as well our son’s personal favorite, the cloud with bath drops. The cloud is really fun because it holds a tablet that changes the bath color, and your child can hold it + pour water in it to make it “rain” the new color until the tablet is dissolved. We haven’t had any problems with the dye on our bathtub!
Have a Bubble Themed Bath
Another way of creating excitement about bath time is to use bubbles - both bath bubbles & the kind you blow and pop. Use a little bit of extra bubble bath (we like the Honest Company’s tear-free bubble bath) to make mountains of bubbles + blow some old-fashioned bubbles right into the bath for your child to pop. There won’t be any slippery mess to clean up because the bath contains it!
Roleplay Bathtime in the Sink
Children learn by play, and helping your child to practice the bath routine without taking a bath often helps. A great way to practice is in the kitchen sink. Bring your child’s bath supplies (bubbles, shampoo, washcloth towel, lotion) downstairs and fill the sink with water & bubbles to create a bubble bath. Have your child help you bathe a favorite babydoll or water-safe toy (even a truck is okay!). Talk through each step of the bath and let your toddler take the lead. When you get to a part of the bath that your child struggles with, talk through the emotions and help your child discuss them through the eyes of the toy. For example, if hair washing is tough, you could rinse the babydoll’s hair, dry its eyes with a washcloth, and comfort the babydoll + praise the babydoll for being brave and staying safe by using the washcloth. Your child can learn that this is safe by mirroring your behavior & supporting his or her doll with the scary parts of bath time.
Allow Your Toddler to Wash Your Hair First
One of the best things we did to make hair-washing feel safe again was allow my toddler to wash my husband’s hair first. My husband leans his head over the bath, lets our son pour water on his head + soap up his hair, lets him rinse it with the rinsing cup, and then dries his hair with a towel. He talks about the way he closes his eyes & how the water on his face didn’t bother him. My son LOVED taking care of his dad & it helped him see that water on his face was okay.
Get in the Bath with Your Toddler
If you’re up for it, take a bath with your toddler. Sure, this isn’t for every parent, but it can help. I personally love being able to play with the bath toys with my son & he feels safe and connected when I’m in there with him. It’s not something we do all the time, but on days when his anxiety about the bath is high, I offer to take a bath with him. It almost always helps him say “yes” to the bath & he cherishes the time together as much as I do.
Offer a Fun Post-Bath Ritual
Sometimes it’s what comes after bath time that makes the biggest difference. Instead of doing bath right before bed, when there isn’t time for play, you might try offering it sooner in the night + doing something special with your child after the bath. You might have a snack and watch a show together, you could play a favorite game, or you could snuggle up and read books. You know your child best, so you know what your child will look forward to doing. Make it a ritual your child can look forward to.
Dr. Julie’s Favorite Toddler Bath Products for Reducing Bath Time Stress & Anxiety
Because so many parents ask me for product recommendations, I’m sharing the products we use in my household to keep bath time fun and exciting for our 24-month old:
Favorite Tool that Stops Splashes from Hitting the Floor: The Tub Topper (it is worth the investment!)
Favorite Tear-Free Bath Soap: Aveeno Baby’s Tearfree Body Wash & Shampoo
Favorite Tear-Free Shampoo: Honest Company’s Foaming Bubble Bath’
Favorite Post-Bath Lotion: Cetaphil Baby Soothe & Protect
Color-Changing Tablets for the Tub:
Products to Keep Water Out of Your Toddler’s Eyes:
Crown Hair Washing Visor (it really works!)
Favorite Toddler Bath Toys & Games:
Squiggs suction toys (can be used on windows too!)
Favorite Hooded Bath Towels (big enough for toddlers):
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